When we got to the café car, a man was getting up from a table. He had been reading the newspaper that he left behind. Bones quickly darted over to the table, sat down, and motioned for me to join him on the other side. He picked up the paper and held it up so his face was blocked from view.

I sat across from him and knocked on the paper. “Knock, knock.”

Bones obliged. “Who’s there?”

“Yora.”

Bones put down the paper and looked at me. “Yora who?”

“Yora dope if you think that newspaper disguise is gonna work.”

But of course the big moron just handed me part of the paper and went right back into hiding. At least I got the Sports page.

I couldn’t help thinking that there was no way I could hold up the paper for the entire ride without my arms falling off. So I put it back on the table and started looking around when the conductor charged by.

He called out, “Have your tickets ready please. I’ll be starting at the back of train and moving up. Tickets ready!” This paper hideout wasn’t going to work, so I started brainstorming a better strategy.

I looked over at the end of the café car, where a woman was walking out of the bathroom. And then it hit me: if we hid in the toilet, there was no way we’d get caught.

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